Two years back, it was just like other evenings, we were spending some lazy time in the terrace of our house. We Were discussing on random issues, like listening the experiences of Subham and Arpan etc.
The chapter of Rahul’s love story was almost forgotten, none of us raised the topic in last three four years, there were nothing new to discuss and we also did not want to take Rahul back to those days which he actually should forget.
Gradually the discussion on social media started, actually I was sharing my recent research work (was doing it myself) in that field, Arpan asked being highly curious
…you are doing research on it but you don’t have any account in FB, is not it ridiculous? Even Rahul never opened any account there, what actually the matter is?
I started with a blow (through words) from my field research
…you know, five six years earlier, when some of my friends used to ask whether I have an account in FB or not then getting a negative reply they used to be surprised and at present the term “Facebookian” is used to defame(Gaali) others.
I did not get you…Arpan informed being surprised.
…how can you? Being a “Facebookian” how can you realize what I mean.
…what do you mean by “facebookian”?
…that’s a logical question, “facebookian” means to those people who shares their pictures now and then in facebook without any purpose or reason.
…so, do you mean FB is not a good place?
…FB is not bad, depends how you use it, just like, a pistol itself is not good or bad… depends upon the user.
…if FB is good then you and Rahul is not there?
Finding a proper reason…Rahul answered.
You know what’s the most neglected subject in our day to day life and education system…I asked Arpan.
…No, I don’t know
Its psychology…Subham answered.
That’s right, any human being does not perform any work without any reason, means behind every activity of human beings there is a reason but sometime we are unable to point out what the reason is? And its natural, coz we are unaware of the functions of our thoughts, we are unaware of the subject “Psychology”…I explained.
…like you, are not a “facebookian”, I just said it out of fun, you are sharing your pics of different concerts and stage performances, coz you need publicity, promotion and marketing but the people, who are posting their own pics now and then, investing time for dress up and make up, investing time to find out a perfect background and lots more, why? Why they are investing so much of time behind all these just to post a pic in fb? Because of two reasons…first, they have enough time to waste and secondly just to get “Like”.
Rahul added more
…have you even seen any IAS officer or a Researcher, a good doctor and such people posting their pics in FB now and then just to show “look I am doing this research” “look I am writing this thesis”, “Look I am operating a patient”, they never do so, coz they don’t have time and they are much involved in their real life activities. There is one more reason for it and that is…they are satisfied with their lives, when you are satisfied with your life then you don’t need any stamp mark (Like) from the people.
Continuing Rahul’s point I started
…if you really happy in life, if you are really satisfied with it, then why do you need people’s opinion?
But fb is a good place to be connected with the people far away from you…Arpan shared what he had listened several times.
Rahul replied with a smile…when did we say that FB is not a good place to be connected with the people, this is a common sentence that can be heard but the question is …why do you need so much of time everyday to be connected with other people, don’t you have your own work? How can you manage so much of time for a pic and why are you so much eager to share your beautiful and handsome pics to show those people?
…you know the most ironical incident is some girls are there who after wearing a dress, suppose it contains less clothes, will say “we don’t care what’s the public opinion about us” but those same girls will share the pics in fb and will count how many likes and comments they have received.
Mental dissatisfaction…Arpan said looking at me.
Yes, that’s what it reflects when you are posting pic crazily, now and then, counting likes, investing time for no reason, as I said psychology is the most ignored subject in our life and education system…I replied.
Once you said me about “Reality” and I have also listened the word “Virtual Reality”, I think there is
some connection between these two and fb…Arpan shared his view.
Out of excitement I almost jumped out
…yes, you got the right point baby, the world of social media is a “virtual reality” and it’s really easy to exist there coz in “real” life you have to face many obstacles, many ups and down are there, those who have lost in the “virtual reality” are far away from “reality” means this real world and its happening for two reasons, dissatisfaction from life and escapist mentality.
Taking a pause, I started again
…let me explain you with a real life example.
Arpan nodded his head and agreed
…there was a boy who was in love with a girl madly, for some reasons they became separate but the girl remained in his heart, he was unable to forget it…
Arpan interrupted with a big smile in his face
…yeh kahani kuchh suni sunayi si lag rahi hai.
…ok, So Rahul was in love with Tina, happy?
…yup, pls continue.
…in the “real Life” you have to face problems and obstacles and there are always two ways, first one, you can escape from the situation and second one is, face it. In the case of Rahul he did not escape from the situation and later on he has gone through a long phase of pain, agony and mental sufferings, generally when we are in pain we always try to avoid but if you ask me personally I will suggest “live that pain” it’s very much necessary for life, live the pain at its fullest, face the sufferings, not only because it’s the ‘truth” of your life rather I must remind you that nothing happens without a reason and it makes you a true human being. Rahul did not escape from his pain and sufferings, he faced those, he suffered a lot so he is not a escapist. On the other hand he is not dissatisfied from life, whatever he has done, whether in relationship or in his career, he has given his cent percent, what he has got that’s a different question but he is satisfied with the thought that "I had given my cent percent" and that’s;’ enough to make his mind satisfied. So, when he is satisfied from life, when he is not an escapist and when he does not need public opinion about himself for no reason then why should he be in Fb?
He has maintained his real life relations giving his best, being a friend I am proud to have a friend like him…Arpan replied.
Do you know :”Xerophyte”…Subham asked us.
I was unaware of it, Rahul did not have much clear idea Arpan’s condition was same as mine.
We looked at him for the answer, He replied
…Rahul is a xerophyte, actually I recently visited Thar and there I have seen some Xerophytes and after listening all these explanation i am feeling to mark him as xerophyte, on the other hand I know how his life was after the break up with Tina, he has suffered from PSTD and Schizophrenia and facing all those he has recovered and existing. Obviously you (looking at me) have big contribution on Rahul’s recovery.
Oh, just forget that, tell me why you are calling him Xerophyte?...i asked with mixed reactions.
Xerophytes are those which can survive in little liquid water, can survive in extreme dry weather , just like Rahul, after facing so many negatives in life, when he was unable to trust people,lost faith in himanity and on the elder ones for the experiences from life but yet survived and it was possible just like it happens in Xerophytes coz they have deep spreading roots, the realization of life is like an ocean, the more deep you go the more deep to be explored, Rahul went deeper In the case of “love” which explains his drowning mentality in the ocean of life’s philosophy, if you have it you will perform work for certain purpose and reason otherwise will follow the crowd blindly.
My twitter handle ....@TheJyotirmoy